Happy Family

Whenever I stop writing I find that the guilt I experience because I haven't been writing - keeps me from writing!

So the easiest thing for me is to just start with the present and not obsess about what I missed...

So here goes!

Life is crazy, busy and amazing these days. Maris is 9 months, Maddie is 7 and Wyatt is 5 and they are some fabulous kids. I don't know if it's because I'm so much more comfortable in my parenting or if it's just because Maris is an easy baby - but I am enjoying her so very much. She is so incredibly funny and silly - she keeps us entertained all day long!

We've had a busy summer - almost 3 weeks down in South Florida with my folks, followed by a week with Mike's mom at the Emerald Grande in Destin. We've spent the rest of the summer hiding in the house from all the thunder storms. 

That's it for tonight - I'm tired... But it's a start, right???

Getting it right... finally

It's taken us almost 7 years and three kids to find our groove as a family.

I'm not sure why, but I've always balked at following a routine or schedule. A free spirit - I prefer to float aimlessly through life. Sadly - it's not always an option when you're deep in the trenches of motherhood and your little ones need structure.

My years as a mother have been fraught with stress over not being a good housekeeper - my laundry is always out of control and my house feels cluttered and overwhelming on a daily basis. I've cleaned out, gotten rid of and re-organized the spaces in my house so many times I've lost count.

The addition of a third little one to our family has caused me to seriously re-evaluate my domestic status. I'm tired of being a slave to my house and dare I say a slave to my (older) children. I've grown tired of picking up after them when they are capable of picking up their own toys. I'm over asking them to do or not to do things over and over and over and over.

So 2012 is the year I get my house and my life in order!

I ended 2011 by deciding to let go of a few things in my life. The hardest decision I had to make was to put homeschooling on hold and send Maddie to first grade. I love having her at home - I love Classical Conversations and teaching her myself. What I didn't love was the fact that she was disrespectful and obstinate about reading and writing. We could sit and do math all day long but when it came to reading we hit a wall. She could read, but she wasn't progressing in my opinion. A perfectionist like her mother, she would hit a word she didn't instinctually know and stop. Asking her to sound it out was futile because she would rather die than do that! This led to a lot of frustration for both of us.

It's been a rough transition for all of us. The first day was great. She was excited and came home so happy. The second morning and every morning since then there have been tears and begging. However she comes home every day and tells me that it was better than the day before. If she wasn't coming home happy I would pull her out in an instant. But I know it's just as hard for her to leave mommy as it is for me to send her to another person for schooling. I miss her. I miss her help with Maris, too.

But there's also this part of me that loves having the two older ones in school. It's so nice to have peace and quiet during the day. I'm actually getting chores done early enough to find time for ME. This is something that hasn't been a priority really, nor a reality.

The biggest benefit of Maddie going to school though, has been the forced routine and organization. I have to get up early in order to make sure she has a good breakfast, her lunch is made, folder in her bag and get her to school on time. The mornings of Wyatt waking up at 8:30 and racing to get ready for preschool are over because he wakes up early with his sister. We are finally finding a rhythm and routine in our family.

It's like a breath of fresh air.

Tonight I'm going to bed with an empty sink and a decent amount of clean laundry. My kitchen isn't quite as tidy as I'd like, but I can work on it some more tomorrow. My floors need to be swept, but I can do that tomorrow as well.

The house seems to be staying cleaner with the older kids both in school - and that's a huge sigh of relief for me :)

Another unexpected benefit is for my laundry basket: Maddie isn't constantly changing her clothes all day as she was when she was at home!

So little by little I'm finding my groove. We've got a rhythm that will only get more defined as the weeks go by. I miss my little girl and boy while they are at school, but I swear I'm a calmer, nicer mom now when they are home.

It's what works best for our family at this time in our life - and that's ok.

The path to a more simple life - time to be just a mom

God's voice has never been something that I hear on a regular basis. I admit that discerning when it's a God-thing and when it's a me-thing is sometimes difficult at best. However over the past few months I've had this nagging feeling that I should go back to just being a mom.

Where does this drive come from to do all the things I do - anyways? There's a certain feeling of inadequacy that creeps in at times to tell me I'm not doing enough and I can do more. When people ask me what I do I admit to feeling inadequate when I answer that I'm just a mom. So I've filled my life with responsibilities and obligations: Lactation counseling, teaching breastfeeding classes, attending homebirths, trying to work some in the midwife's office, planning teas at church, leading LLL meetings and taking on the position of AAPL with the LLL area of FL and the English speaking Islands. This is in addition to my desire to homeschool my children, keep a garden growing, care for chickens, cats and a dog - on top of trying to cook from scratch, eat organic produce and healthy meats - all the while dreaming of living a more simple and sustainable life!

And then there are times when I sit and seriously contemplate all those things I accomplish as "just a mom." My daughter is learning how to read, my son is learning how to be a sweet little boy. My kids are learning how to garden and care for animals, they play well together. I'm teaching Maddie how to play the piano - we're learning simple French phrases and words. Sometimes I want to just sit and marvel at the wonderful little people we're raising - I should do this more often because it encourages me in my mothering.

I can't tell you how many times lately I've told them "not right now" or "just a minute" because I was too busy reading an email, talking on the phone or doing something online that just HAD to be addressed at that minute and my children were put on the back burner.

That makes me feel like a terrible person. Especially when I call my child and they tell me "just a minute" or "not right now."

So I want to start saying "yes - i have time for you" instead of constantly sending them the message that they aren't as important as whatever I'm doing at that moment.

The past few weeks have been a hard wake-up call for Mike and I on not just the state of our own marriage, but the state of several of our friends' marriages. Just in our circle there are 4 families either divorcing or quickly heading that way. Every situation is different, but still serious issues that seem to be irreconcilable. Seeing what this is doing to their families and to their children is so hard to watch and after we recently renewed our wedding vows we promised each other that this would not happen to us. Let's face it - the odds for marriage just aren't that great and it takes a lot of hard work to keep things rolling, especially when you have young kids.

Sometimes I need to remind myself that I just don't have to or need to work. I'm one of the very lucky ones who can be a stay-at-home-mom with no regrets and I should embrace that fully. I just wish that I didn't feel like I always have to be doing something else to make it count for myself. Being a mom should just be enough. After all I am contributing to the future of society in raising responsible, loving and compassionate children, right?

Of course making this decision means that I'm going to have to ultimately let some people down - mostly the people I work with in homebirth. While I love being at the births and find it incredibly empowering and healing - I find that I don't like being away from my children or husband. I miss them terribly and worry a lot while I'm away from them. Part of me feels like this is still something I've been called to do, but that maybe right now just isn't the right time. My children need ME now - not anyone else. There will be many more homebirths years down the road when my children are older and don't depend on me nearly as much as they do now. I know some people with young children who are in similar lines of work and have no problems leaving their children - but I'm just not comfortable with doing it when they are so young and impressionable. I can only find peace knowing that I'm making the best decision for myself and my family.

One other reason I've come to this realization is that Maddie will be homeschooled starting next Fall and I know I will need to focus completely on homeschooling in the beginning. It will take us a while to get into a rhythm with our schooling and I want that to be a high priority as she starts her "formal" education. We are planning several trips as well and I want the freedom and flexibility to turn these trips into educational experiences.

Michael is fully supportive of this I might add - he wants me to cut all my obligations and just focus on raising our kids and enjoying our family. He says that things that cause me so much stress aren't worth it and ultimately he's correct. He's been asking me to do this for a while and honestly it's time I honored my husband and just stayed home (well not all the time  - I do need to go to the grocery store at times!)

So my days of a more simple life are upon me. I am continuing as a LLL leader and the AAPL for Florida and ESI. I will still be the organizer for the Barbara Harper Waterbirth Training in May and then I'm free! I'm going to practice saying NO more often and just enjoy life with my two brilliant kids who want me to teach them everything about life and more. 


We're so happy that Spring is here - our garden is starting to thrive again and seeds will start poking their heads out soon. 


Travels will take us to Central Florida in May for the FL and ESI Leader's retreat for LLL. The kids and I are heading to Indiana in April for a wedding and some exploring up there during the spring. Maddie graduates from preschool in June (I just can't believe it!). 


Life is really wonderful these days. I love my kids and husband - my chickens and garden. I've found good organic produce and dry goods through the local buying club and will start getting fresh milk products in 2 weeks, too! Next on my list is to buy either a half or quarter of a cow that is grassfed/finished and to pick up the chicken (meat) from a local kid who is raising them to sell. I also think a trip to Pensacola is soon on the schedule - time to go to Ever'mans and play at some of the parks there in town, too.


Beach days are fastly approaching as well - I better get them in before it gets so hot!

writer's lament

It's late and I'm tired, but seeing that technology has yet to develop a usb port that plugs into a mom's head and downloads all those thoughts and moments worth recording (and ones not worth it) - I'm forcing myself to sit and write for a few minutes before I spontaneously combust from lack of writing recently.

If you aren't a writer you probably don't get it.

When I'm not writing - I'm depressed, anxious, grouchy and not a lot of fun to be around mostly. I fake it pretty well - but I always get to the point where I have to write or I'm going to explode. Mostly I write (or want to write) about the little things that happen in my day-to-day life. Sometimes I write to complain, or decompress or as a means of therapy. Those blogs typically don't show up here, though - they're too incriminating! I keep those private for the most part - a few (and I mean like two) people have access to those thoughts, but I hardly ever write there these days so they've moved on to other more consistent blogging friends who don't leave them hanging for weeks, months at a time.

Seeing that I haven't written in weeks really - I'm a mess.

Tonight I blew up at my husband for sending Wyatt to me to wipe off a booger. Why was this such a big deal you might ask? Surely a mother knows that part of her job description reads "must wipe boogers."

Well I'll tell you why - I was in the bathroom! I was having a few minutes to myself for the first time in the day and the last thing I wanted to do was lean across the room to open the door and wipe a disgusting booger off my son's finger!

I would say that most dads just don't know what it's like to never use the bathroom without an audience. Whether it's communal peeing (Wyatt still prefers the little potty) or conversations that just CAN'T wait until I get out - I honestly lose track of all the excuses. I tend not to lock the door because the screaming and banging is worse than the reason they needed to interrupt me in the first place.

So there I was sitting for a few moments, leafing through my brand new copy of Mother Earth News and I was offended as I listened to my husband tell my son to not only show me his booger (which he did and I told him it was gross and closed the door) - but to go back to mommy and ask her to wipe it off his finger! GRRRRR

I promise you if I'd have pulled the same prank on him if HE was on the toilet he would have been pissed! But was it ok for me to be offended and get upset? No!

In my fit of rage, upset I yelled at him and demanded if it was too much to ask to have 5 minutes uninterrupted to sit on the toilet BY MYSELF and not have to wipe boogers, answer questions, console hurt feelings, etc. I just wanted a few minutes to myself for crying out loud.

His response was not nice as he yelled at me to just leave since all I had been complaining about all day was that I needed some time away.

So this is how I get back to my writer's angst.

I had waited patiently all week for Sunday to come. Mike worked all day (and I mean ALL day yesterday). He left somewhere between 8 a.m. and 9 a.m. and returned home at MIDNIGHT. He worked late several nights last week and I was hanging by a thin thread by this morning - I just needed some time by myself - a cup of coffee and free WIFI and a table and chair to sit in - so I could write and decompress. I needed these moments so I could return home refreshed and be a better mommy and wife.

So today dawned and Mike talked about wanting to go to Destin to see clients and the earlier the better. It still took us a good 2 hours to get out of the house and by the time we got to Destin with the kids and dog it was close to 1 p.m. and I wistfully considered that I would have been on my own if our day had gone the way I'd planned.

We had a nice lunch at Harry T's. We saw dolphins in the pass, the dog sat nicely, slept, drove us nuts because he couldn't sit still. My food was wonderful, tasty, hot, cold and not very good. I will never again order the tenderloin benedict - it was terrible! After the almost hour it took to get our food we ate and walked back to the truck in the rain...

The clients weren't at the boat although we were able to visit with a good friend of theirs.

We went to home depot where despite my husband's help, lack of help I managed to pick out lumber, get it cut, pick out plants and compost, etc - with both of my kids running around and wyatt throwing a terrible tantrum as I was checking out and the cashier putting the compost trash can on top of my broccoli plants and breaking half of them. Where was Mike? He was in the truck with the dog - because he didn't want to leave him alone in the truck.

Following the tantrum, I pushed my cart at Mike- who I had called while checking out - to bring the truck up to the door... I carried my screaming 3 year old on my hip as I went back and got non-broken broccoli plants and took them back to the truck - then walked all the way across the store to the bathroom where I helped both of them use the bathroom and then got a soda in the self checkout line and then we went home.

I took my frustrations out on my garden - wrestling the wooden pieces into a grid for my new square-foot garden bed - I pounded the nails into the timbers and ended up with 28, 1 ft squares. I planted some of the plants I purchased and interrupted my gardening to go put a diaper on wyatt because Mike was ignoring him when he was on the phone and I had asked Wyatt to ask him daddy to help since I was elbow deep in dirt and fish emulsion.

But mommy saved the day and quickly washed her hands and got the diaper on before there was an accident (more on potty training struggles later) - changed the diaper and finished the grid  - all before the booger-toilet incident.

Actually I forgot - before the toilet incident Maddie caught a frisbee point blank in the face (nose I think) and had a meltdown and then Wyatt started crying when I talked to him about not throwing the frisbee at his sister's head. We all piled into my bed to turn on a movie and calm down and Mike promptly fell asleep - at 6 p.m.!

I guess in a way I'm jealous because I never get to just fall asleep like that - the kids would never allow it. They'd be crawling on me or crying or whining or banging on the door. And I'm a little resentful that my husband fell asleep during our family movie moment and got an hour nap (would have been longer if i hadn't turned on the lights and demanded he get up and help me!).

Ok- so I know this post is whiney and negative - but I've had a crappy day and I set out to do some writing and this is just what came out.

yes - i know that I have A LOT to be thankful for - and I'm most thankful that I have two wonderful kids who drive me crazy and a husband who puts up with my moods and emotional outbursts. We're healthy and happy most of the time and have family who loves us a whole lot and then some.

Sometimes you just need to vent!

Introducing Apollo

It's funny how things fall into place sometimes. 

We started talking seriously about getting another dog - a few months ago. Mike was dead set on a German Shorthair Pointer - a dog that I had absolutely no interest in as a family dog. From the research 

I'd done myself they came across as energetic and bred to kill/retrieve birds. That wasn't going to work with my pet hens!

I pleaded for something like a Welsh Pembroke Corgi - I love those little dogs. However, they're herders and are known to nip ankles and bums of little ones so eventually we dimissed that breed as a possibility.

Now before someone leaves me a scathing comment about rescuing or adopting from a rescue society let me say that I brought that up several times. We even looked at some rescue societies for the purebreeds, but didn't see what we were looking for.

Some of you may know that we previously owned a Doberman Pinscher. Her name was Mae and she passed away last year at 10 years old. She was a rescue - we adopted her when she was 5 years old. When we got down to the knock down drag out discussions of which breed we were going to get I finally told Mike that the only pure bred dog I would consider would be another Doberman.

So that started it - hours were spent pouring over breeder websites (there aren't many close to us) and the puppy sale websites (where breeders, etc list their dogs). We discussed color and sex, along with whether we wanted ears cropped or not and how much we wanted to spend on a dog.

Prices for Doberman puppies range from a few hundred dollars to thousands of dollars. We knew we weren't looking for a show quality dog or a breeding dog - we just wanted something that fit the breed standard and had parents with good dispositions and solid pedigrees. Championship bloodlines weren't a priority, but making sure that it was healthy and free from some of the diseases that can affect purebreeds  was something we wanted to take into consideration.

We're actually on a waiting list for a little of puppies due to be bred and born sometime this summer. We're waiting to hear back from another breeder in Alabama who is planning to breed her dogs this summer.

Like I said, it's funny how things happen sometimes...

Mike's mom, Paula, called him one day last week to say that someone in Crestview had a litter of AKC Doberman puppies listed in the online classifieds. He didn't call me immediately - but in a later conversation mentioned it casually and said maybe I could call.

So I called - and there was one pup left - a black and tan male. I called Mike back and we agreed that we wanted to at least go look at him - even though it most likely wasn't the dog we were looking for.

We arrived after dark (without the kids) and met the puppy - who was very friendly and seemed to like us enough. He allowed me to pick him up like a baby and curled up in my arms and just laid there. Our only concern was wanting to see the pedigree, which the man didn't know its location and wanting to meet the parent dogs. It was dark and the owner refused to accommodate us that night. We agreed that I would return the next day.

I talked my sister into going with me (thank you natalie!) and we drove up to go meet the parents and see the puppy again.

Well, you know the rest of the story....

We named him Apollo - which ironically means "destroyer."

So far he's not living up to his name, although the house training is a bit of a challenge at times. He's the most mellow puppy I think I've ever met! He plays some and sleeps a lot - eats food like he's never been fed in his life and drinks so much water it's a wonder he doesn't pee gallons (close to it though!).

His birthday is October 23, 2009 (he shares a birthday with my best friend Rebecca's husband, Brett!) and when I weighed him at Petsmart he was 22.5 pounds. He's going to be a big dog and I have to say part of me is glad he's a male even though I prefer female dogs. He is a bit protective and I like that - it will come in handy when Mike is out of town and I can rely on him to alert me to strange noise that go bump in the night.

The kids enjoy him and since he's on the mellow side they're having a better adjustment I think. The cats are another issue - he was around cats at his birth home, but he barks and playfully growls and paws at our feline friends and they are none too appreciative. I don't think Azzie has come off her bookshelf in 3 days! Pumpkin is warming up - he's the one who has never been around dogs much at all and was the most standoffish and mean to the puppy. He swiped him really well across the face this morning. Tarmak is ironically the most friendly towards him - odd for the scaredy cat. My hens are a little traumatized and he's working hard on learning not to chase them, but they run from him so that makes him want to chase even more!

Most importantly is that Mike is in love with him - and I find a lot of joy in my husband being so excited about something! At this moment he's in the recliner with the dog curled up in his lap. Apollo sleeps on the floor on Mike's side of the bed and is now spoiled by going everywhere with us in the car. He is working on his crate training as well because once the summer heat sets in he won't be going with us as much.

So meet Apollo - he's a sweet little guy and has melted into our family so well it's like he's always been here!

I'll post a picture of that same scene in a few months when the dog is close to 100 lbs!

A poem, a thought and a memory

I'm reading through this cookbook my grandmother, Pauline, sent to my mother for Christmas. It's put out by the Etude Club and is a collection of recipes, history and what made up the heart and soul of this club.

Founded in 1892 it has been a strong voice for literacy in Jefferson County - upstate New York. My father and his family grew up in Adams, NY. My grandmother has been a member of this club for many years (I'll have to remember to ask her how long). The club supports literacy and awards "scholarships" to students mainly in lower grades for showing "outstanding interest in books," "greatest improvement in scholarship, leadership, service, character and citizenship."

I think it's really cool that one of their awards is for kindergarten students. It's a mere $10- but ten bucks to a 5 or 6 year old is a lot of money (at least to my kids). This club reminds me of my middle school days when they would have an awards ceremony at the end of the year. I still have my certificates somewhere, but they also gave cash awards. It was a total surprise to me the first year I experienced this - but I walked away with more than $100 for awards in English, Art, Science and I think I even got the coveted principal's award one year (They only gave two of these each year).

But I digress for the real reason I decided to write about this cookbook and it's because there was a little poem that just spoke to me deeply. I read it to my husband and even though it's just a few lines he had a terribly blank look on his face when I finished.

"Would you like me to read it again?" I asked, fully prepared to repeat it to him.

"No, how about you just explain it to me?" he answered.

I went on to paraphrase it for him, even though I basically said the same words in the poem again. You'll have to tell me if you "get it."

I'm sure most moms understand!

There is no title, just the author's name. She was apparently one of the most recent Etude Club President and I'd like to think she's a young mom like me with younger children.

By Diana W. Smith, Etude President 2007-2008

Sometimes,
While shuffling
4 pots on a 3-burner stove;
The bathroom avalanched
With laundry disengorged
From the hamper,
And none of the dishes done;
2 kids crying
And needing noses wiped,
I wonder
What it would be like,
Cooking dinner
for 1.

The lost art of washing dishes

The water runs, filling the sink with warm bubbles. In lieu of waiting for the dishwasher to finish so I can reload and re-run it again I piled the leftover dishes into my sink and proceeded to wash them the old fashioned way - by hand.

When it comes to household tasks there are few that I enjoy. Mike and I actually used to quarrel regularly over who was going to empty the dishwasher. I have to say that I've given up and usually just do it myself with Maddie's help. At least this way I'm pleasantly pleased when he does it on his own.

But tonight as I found myself standing at the sink, listening to the "Laurie Berkner family station" on Pandora - I realized that I actually was enjoying the quiet monotony of washing dishes.

On Wednesday this week I taught at class to a local daycare staff and the second half of the class was on the secrets of baby behavior. One of the points that was pounded out over and over was that the simple act of repetition is calming to babies.

It must carry over into adulthood -at least for me.

As I stood there, washing, rinsing, placing, washing, rinsing, placing I started to feel relaxed. I've been tired and cranky all day - no thanks to myself - it's my fault for having such a good time out for New Year's. But with each dish I felt a little of the fatigue and moodiness wash away. I was enjoying the moment - when both of my kids were there in the kitchen with me - dancing to the music and having fun.

I can't remember the artist's name at the moment, but the man who sings on the Curious George soundtrack is a favorite for all three of us and it just felt right to be standing in my kitchen, washing dishes and watching my two little ones dance and giggle.

All was right for a brief few moments in our world tonight. I imagine I will be washing dishes by hand a bit more frequently over the next year.

It's funny the places we find peace in our lives.

Happy New Year!

Our great Christmas Adventure

note: pictures coming soon, check back often!

You know how it is - it’s vacation time and all you want is to leave the house clean and in order so it’s not a wreck when you get home. Well - I have yet to experience that (except for the time I paid one of my friends to organize while we were gone and that was fabulous!). We left on Dec. 17 - hoping to be on our way by early morning and instead finally pulling out around 10ish after ransacking the house for the power cord to the dvd player - only to discover that it no longer worked.

We made it to Columbus before we finally broke down and bought a new one - I don’t know how we did it back in the day before cars had movie players! I remember reading a lot, but my kids don’t read yet so that isn’t even an option really! We had stopped in Eufala, AL for lunch at the Cajun Corner where we dined on spicy etouffe and chicken strips before loading back up to spend an hour and a half in Columbus hunting the elusive dual screen portable dvd player. We eventually found one at Best Buy where I grabbed it off the shelf and bought it and promptly installed it while the kids played under a gigantic black and white cow.

Continuing on we detoured slightly to stop and say hi to David Yates - one of the buddies to the Mixed Nuts guys. He owns Hawkins Oil - an oil and fuel distributor out of LaGrange, GA. With new pens and hats in hand we loaded up once again and breezed through Atlanta (mostly, but there were still some slow segments as the last of rush hour cleared through) and rolled into Ellijay about 8:30 p.m. Central (9:30 local time).

Harry and Elaine were excited to see us and Mike was a little speechless at the beauty of their mountaintop cabin. We ate pizza and caught up on what our lives had been up to since the last time we’d visited.

The next morning dawned gray and rainy and it continued to pour steadily for the rest of the day. I made pumpkin pancakes for Mike’s birthday and the kids serenaded him with a beautiful rendition of “Happy Birthday.” We took our time in the morning - Mike actually went back to bed for a few hours with a nasty headache (from sleeping wrong on his neck). We eventually were all dressed and loaded up into the same vehicle and headed into town to go to Deli Junction. It’s just a regular sized restaurant where you order at the counter and get a number to display on your table - but it has to be one of the best sandwich places I’ve eaten at in my lifetime. They always have a lunch special where you can get either a half or whole sandwich of the day with chips and a drink for $3.50 or $5 respectfully. The special of the day was a Reuben and I got the half and subbed a cup of tomato vegetable soup instead of chips (my mouth is still pretty sore!). I have to say that I’m really not a sandwich person and I ended up wishing that I’d gotten a whole instead of a half because it was so good! The last time we were there it was the Cuban on special and that was just as tasty!

The neat thing about Deli Junction is the train track that runs along the ceiling. There is a huge, red button on the wall that makes the train go and Wyatt can’t wait until he’s tall enough to hit it on his own.

Since the weather was terrible - raining and cold - we took the kids to an indoor play place with the huge inflatable jumping things. They seemed to enjoy it - the huge slide was a big hit.

We celebrated Mike's birthday that night with some cake and candles. I made a tasty dinner, too!

On Saturday we decided to take a day trip to Dahlonega, Ga. It was the site of the first gold rush in the United States. On our way there we stopped at Amicalola Falls - a state park. It has an amazing waterfall. There are steps that start at the base of the falls and go all the way up. It was really cold, though so we didn’t even attempt to climb up. We drove to the top and looked down - it was impressive! Being from Florida, however, our kids were quite wimpy with the cold and after just a few minutes at the falls they wanted to go back to the car. This park is one of the few that has a lodge and we decided to drive further up and check it out.

What an amazing view we had from the lodge! (and it was warm inside!). We were excited to find they were having a wild bird show and got to see some local owls and even a vulture (who was quite stinky, but very gentle). We had lunch in their restaurant - our table next to the floor to ceiling window and then continued on to our original destination.

In Dahlonega we had a hard time getting to the gold mine - there was a natural gas leak and all the roads were blocked off. Eventually the roads reopened and we were able to find our way to the mine. We were practically the only ones there! There was one other man who had come up from Atlanta to tour the mine and otherwise it was just our little family. When you purchase the mine tour you get to pan for gold so we did that first and all walked away millionaires (well we wish!). Actually we all managed a few flakes. What we enjoyed the most was the gemstone “grubbing.” I really think Maddie is a future rock hound. She had so much fun sluicing for gems that I bought another, bigger bucket for us to do after the mine tour. The mine was impressive. I don’t think many of my pictures turned out well but it was cool! We actually went down into the mine - back in the day they discovered a 22 foot vein of quartz and gold and in one day removed 55 pounds of gold! Eventually the mine filled up with water - and part of it is still underwater today. There is a place where they were drilling holes for dynamite blasting and instead of just a hole they hit an aquifer. This eventually did the mine in - it flooded! The new owners were able to divert the water into a creek and now only part of the mine is under water. You can see the water eerily glowing green down one of the abandoned tunnels - I really wanted a closer view, but you know - safety first!

We got back late that night and slept in on Sunday morning. Our plan for the day was to go eat breakfast at Corks and Crumbs - one of the best breakfast’s I’ve ever eaten - and a neat little shop as well. After breakfast we drove to Cleveland, TN where our family friends Gary and Carol Little live. I’m going to digress and tell the story about how I know the Little family in just a bit, but first I want to tell about our drive there.

Harry had given us directions to Cleveland - he mentioned another way to get there that would take forever, but followed the mountain ridge. He suggested NOT going that way, but neither Mike nor I could remember how many left and rights and where to turn so we decided to follow the GPS instead.

How thankful am I that we followed the GPS!!! The route it gave us ended up being the way Harry said would take forever and it was really just what we were looking for in a drive. It’s hard for me to really even express in words how amazingly beautiful this drive was.

The biggest thrill was that it had snowed.

It wasn’t a big snow - just a few little patches of white on roofs and cars and on the leaves cluttering the sides of the road. As we gained elevation, however - it seemed to be a little bit more of an accumulation and around 2900 feet elevation it was about a half an inch. I know my friends in Montana and up North are laughing at a measly half an inch, but it was enough to make everything white and that was all that mattered to us!

There was a scenic overlook boasting 180 degree view and we pulled over and bundled up. Having spent most of my cognitive childhood in Montana - I put on my parka, gloves and scarf - trying to convince my children that they also needed to take proper precautions. I succeeded in their warm coats but both refused hats and gloves.

Boy did they regret that once we started hiking up to the overlook!

Graciously there was enough snow to make a decent snowball and maddie was scooping up small handfuls and eating it - despite us asking her not to eat it! We threw a few snowballs and I pegged Mike in the back and he walked the rest of the way with half a snowball stuck to his shoulder! At the top was an amazing view and a stone pavilion (covered in ice). Mike and Maddie made it up before Wyatt and I did - and Maddie promptly walked onto the stone and slipped and fell. Mike, thinking it was a good idea, pulled up up by her hood and nearly strangled her! There was much crying and screaming from both of my chilly children. We did manage a self-family portrait and Wyatt got the hang of keeping his frozen fingers in his pockets by the time we were headed back down the trail. Thankfully we had left the van running and locked it with the extra set of keys so it was toasty warm for our nearly frozen small fry.

As we continued down the road it began to look like a magical snowy fairy tale. The rain we had the night before had coated every tree, grass and solid structure with water that turned to ice and then snow. I’ve always called it a hoarfrost (I think that’s the definition of what we were seeing). It was one of the prettiest things I’ve seen in my life. Looking out across the mountains you could see the higher peaks that were solid white, giving way to greens and browns where the air was warmer. It was 28 degrees up at the highest point of our drive and warmed to a balmy 35 or 36 degrees at the bottom of the mountain. Despite the lack of mass amounts of snow - it just looked like winter.

One of the things that amazed me the most was the line of division between the meager snow and the winter wonderland of the hoarfrost. It was not gradual - but immediate. One minute it was just brown trees and snow-scattered leaves along the sides of the roads and the next everything was white!

We arrived at the Little’s house soon after their other house guests left - we had planned to arrive a little later and were surprised when the GPS said their house was only two miles away!

My family met the Little’s when we were stationed at Upper Heyford AFB in England. We all belonged to Calvary Baptist Church - a church that we basically built from the building up! I remember when it was just an empty building and a huge grand piano. It was once a dance hall/ social club. The Bible says that whenever two or more are gathered in God’s name that He is there with us and so our little church was formed. It was mostly military families and eventually a few British families joined our congregation. I remember the day my dad was baptized in a chest freezer and it overflowed when he was put under the water! (and then again I remember the day I was baptized and my feet went out from underneath me).

Gary and Carol have three sons - all of them older than me. The oldest was in high school when I was in my early elementary years. They were part of our extended family though - as many families do when separated from their blood relatives. I grew up calling them Uncle Gary and Aunt Carol and still to this day feel weird not calling them that! It’s amazing how many years went by with very little contact - we all scattered across the United States when we were done with our tours in England. Many landed in Colorado Springs, Clovis, NM - but we were stationed in Great Falls, MT - so very isolated from all the other families we’d grown so close to in England. The Tuckers, Byrd’s, Loomis’, Little’s - those are the families I remember most and thanks to Facebook I’ve been able to reconnect with many of them!

I know Mike was a little leery of going to visit this family - they were total strangers to him. On the way there he kept asking me - “Who are these people we’re going to stay with?”

His tune changed about 10 minutes after we walked in the door. I think Carol had it right when she posted on Facebook after we left - that some people just feel right when they come into your home and life. We’ve now been officially adopted as part of the family and Mike is now their honorary 4th son and they finally have a granddaughter - as ironically all of their three sons have gone on to father all boys themselves! They have been blessed with five beautiful (and rambunctious) grandsons! We had the chance to meet and hang out with Tim and Tracy - and their two sons Seth(8) and Ben (4). Wyatt had a blast playing with Ben and all four kids got on really well actually. I’ve found a new friend in Tracy - we really hit it off and are hoping that they’ll take us up on our offer for a free place to stay at the beach. Tracy hasn’t ever been to the beach so it would be our pleasure to spoil her with our white sand beaches and emerald green waters!

After a great family dinner (10 of us!) and a terrible night’s sleep (Wyatt was up a lot and the antique grandfather clock kept me up a lot - I’m a really light sleeper!) - we packed up and drove into Chattanooga to an adventure that included the Tennessee Aquarium, ice cream at Ben and Jerry’s and some shopping at the Hamilton Mall. I’m ecstatic to say that for my birthday Mike bought me a replacement battery for my laptop and I’m once again cord-free.

We returned “home” late in the evening and spent some more time visiting. Both kids crashed hard and I was able to spend some time chatting with Carol before heading to bed. Thanks to some Excedrin PM I slept all night - and so did Wyatt! I awoke to a crisp morning and many Happy Birthday’s on the day of my 31st birthday.

After a yummy breakfast of French toast and bacon we packed up, said our goodbyes with promises to visit again soon and drove back to Chattanooga for the free admission to the Discovery Children’s Museum where we played and played for about two hours. It was a really neat place - we’ve been to the one in Portland and now the one in Chattanooga and I really wish we had one nearby in Florida. I’ve heard that Panama City has something so I’m going to make a point to check it out soon.

After lunch at the Big River Brewery we packed back into the van and drove back through Cleveland so we could ramble back through the mountains.

Sadly the weather was much warmer and the snow was all but gone. There were a few leaves by the wayside with white on them, but nothing as spectacular as the drive up. It seemed to go so much quicker too! I did take a few moments to write a little bit - it’s nothing beautiful and probably pretty choppy, but if I add some pictures it might make sense. Mike kept interrupting me to tell me to stop writing and watch out the window. After nearly 8 years of marriage he still hasn’t learned how much writing means to me... Maybe more time will help.

So here are my mountain thoughts - they end abruptly as I was told to put my computer away...

“The way the sun hits the side of the mountains. The weeping walls - icicles dangling down from the rock ledges. 1700, 2200, 2900 feet high. The many, rushing creeks cascading down the mountain side. The way the mountains look from a distance - like layers of fondant icing folded to make the rounded hills and mountain tops. Driving through Chattanooga where the rocks were cut to put in the road - hundreds of layers of rock slanted sideways where if I imagine I can see the forces of nature moving the rocks and pushing the layers against each other. The feeling of being so close to God - marveling at His creation of so many wonderful things. I feel small in the mountains - humble that in the midst of so many miraculous creations He took the time to create me and how thankful I am for the life He has given to me.”

I would have written more....

One day I’m going to travel to the mountains by myself and just write until my soul is full and my thoughts are empty for a moment or two.

We arrived back in Ellijay, Ga and ran into Harry and Elaine as they were walking down the street. “There’s Harry and Elaine,” Mike called out - and sure enough they were walking down the street!

We got the cranky kids out of the car and walked around to a few shops before heading to Shane’s - a bbq chain that is popular in Georgia. We’d never been there before but I have to say it was rather tasty. Wyatt fell asleep when we pulled into the parking lot and proceeded to sleep through dinner. He was awake again by the time we got back to the cabin - in time for birthday cake provided by Harry and Elaine - complete with a “31” candle (well a 3 and a 1 together!). They were so sweet - they gave us both Ellijay t-shirts and bought cakes on both mine and Mike’s birthdays. I especially liked the cake they bought for my birthday - it was double chocolate with a buttercream frosting. (that reminds me that I had an awesome chocolate cake with sour cream frosting at Carol Little’s house and must get the recipe!).

Wednesday was cold, but not the crispy morning they said they’d had when we were on our little side trip to Chattanooga. Thankfully it was a nice day and the kids finally got the chance to play in the woods behind the cabin while Mike worked on splitting all the wood Harry had been wanting to split. At 70 he’s very active and upbeat, but I’m glad that Mike was there to split the wood for him! I know Harry appreciated it and remarked several times that Mike seemed a natural. I think all his years of splitting wood in Illinois as a teenager paid off.

I got to enjoy a rare, few hours out shopping with Elaine. I picked up a few last minute gifts at the local Wal-Mart and then we hit several antique stores and just browsed.

Our last night in Ellijay we had leftovers and boxed pizzas while enjoying a roaring fire and root beers. I stayed up late washing clothes and packing up so there wouldn’t be as much to do in the morning.

The morning came too early and after a wonderful, hot shower I re-entered the freezing reality of a cabin in the mountains in winter and promptly climbed back into bed with Wyatt!

We’ve now been in the car for almost 6 and a half hours and we’re just about home. The kids have been great - thanks to three new movies I picked up from the $5 row at Wal-mart yesterday. Wyatt even took a nap.

It’s hard to believe our adventure has come to an end.

Florida welcomed us with rain and wind - 56 degrees - and more severe weather on its way.

While many of our friends and family will celebrate Christmas in the cold and snow - we’ll be tromping through chilly puddles and muddy ground as we celebrate Jesus’ birthday and time with my family.

If I have one memory I want to hang onto from all our adventures it’s the one of feeling loved by people who have chosen to incorporate us into their families willingly. They don’t have to love us or adopt us - but they want us and love us no matter what. That’s what family is truly all about - unconditional love and we were lucky enough to experience that in two different families this Christmastime.

We count ourselves truly blessed by safe travels and happy children - loving “grandma’s” and “grandpa’s” and “aunts” and uncles” as well as two new “cousins” to add to our happy family.

Merry Christmas to you!